Love is such a small word, but is soo complex a subject because there are soo many miscomprehensions surrounding it.

Wars have been thought over love, crimes performed in the name of love, songs have been sung. So many relationships turn into a routine were the words i love you are blurted out without any thought; the meaning lost, it can so easily become a ritual.

So what is love? soo many definitions exist out there, some romantic some primal. So many people confuse lust and passion with love. that feeling of adrenaline you feel when you meet someone new? is that love? is love really all you need? its such an abused word i find myself often reluctant to use it.

To me the definition of  love isnt that complex – love is derriving pleasure from pleasing another – it is being willing to give, to connect. it is being a a true freind, a soulmate, being able to completely trust with your partner and rely on them.

Love is even more than that, although i think that my defininion isnt bad from a technical standpoint. Its a feeling – almost undefinable – a bond. Sometimes people touch you in ways that its hard to explain – and i touched on this when i blogged on friendship – sometimes people touch your lives the mark they leave on your heart will never dissapear, like that first footprint on the moon – changing it forever. love is that feeling of relief you get when you hold the one you care for in your arms.

it has very little to do with physical prescence – love transcends that and Love is not always a good thing though – for some love can burn and hurt intensely – the pain of not being able to be with the one you love is a cruel unrelenting pain.

As i look up at the stars i smile with a serene happiness – remembering all those people i have met in life, some who are still here, and some who are gone forever – i can feel where people have touched my soul, and made me the person i am today.

I think its worth sometimes stopping, feeling, and  thinking when you whisper the words “i love you” … exactly what they mean.


Kina Grannis

Ok this is a quick story of music and association in my mind. a while back i was searching for a song by regina spektor and i came across this cover:

I have to admit i was fairly impressed, she had a really nice voice, and when i posted the regina spektor video i actually considered for the first time ever of actually putting the cover version in there.  Kina Grannis seems to be making a career for herself and i really do wish her luck. It was interesting to see that she has both facebook and twitter and i am wondering wether on not such technologies actually personalise things and keep fans in touch. I dont follow any musicians particullary so somebody else will have to tell me if giving out twitter addresses is common practice. I got to thinking about all this because i just heard the end credits to a film called Ondine and it just popped into my head that Kina could do a good job with that one:

i like mellow music. Kina actually has her own blog – which is nearly as popular as mine! ( Its interesting that she has polls in there and actually takes input from her fanbase – i dont think ive ever seensomeone with such and intimate relationship with their fanbase and i can t help but wonder how popular she is.

Brunch at Matts


Brunch at Matts started at 11am and didnt finish until around 7pm – which was really cool and fun.Most people were gone by about one but it was great to stay longer. Its nice to be having a weekend where i can just chill and there are no impending deadlines on monday.

Its fair to say that as is polish tradition (Matts wife is polish) i went home stuffed full of food and content and although we didnt drink alchohol,  with good company, its really not needed. For some reason i stil feel hungover this morning though !

….thanks Matt + Eva, look forward to doing it again sometime!


Jerry Springer

I just caught 5 mins of jerry springer whilst I frantically searched the apartment for the remote and I have to admit I am shocked. I think its probably the most pathetic TV program ive seen ever. There are a couple of things that really stand out for me.

Firstly the people – I accept that the world has many diverse people, and they each have rights, but its hard to have respect for people who don’t have respect for themselves. I mean if I was dating someone and I was given an invitation to go to springer because my gf wanted to tell me something I would probably be running in the opposite direction. Im a private person at the best of times, and if its “interesting” enough to warrant an appearance on springer I am sure that I wouldn’t want it aired in public… what kind of person agrees to appear on springer?

Secondly – all that mouthing and fighting – I mean most of the program seems to be about people angry with each other and trying to hit each other – its interesting that they are not really trying to hurt each other, they basically just run at each other until they get a hug from the security guys (I may be being unfair here I don’t think ive ever seen more than 2 episodes) I find it hard to imagine anyone on that program being more than mouth, or actually trying to escape the security guy by sticking an elbow in the face of the security guy or something.

Thirdly is the issues truelly seemed to be pathetic. Some guy there was dating two transsexuals behind each others back… I mean who cares?

Fourth is the audience – I mean it seemed to just be about the audience name calling the people.

Fifth is Jerry Springer himself – he just stands there like an idiot half the time, there is no real social interest, no real questions, its just a circus.

Sixth is the nudity – people were semi naked – girls were topless – WHY????

… I cant help but wonder how much of springer is real and how much is manufactured “Entertainment” – and I say that in its loosest terms. All I know for sure is there are some crazy people in America – I have no idea if he finds the one crazy person in a million or if there are a lot more of them than that.

Theres an interesting paper written on TV choices at University of Milan (read it here). The paper suggests that people prefer low brow programming such as springer but don’t really enjoy it that much. People say they prefer more highbrow programming which is apparently more rewarding – but sensationalism sells.

Ive just written over 460 words to say something I could sum up in six “The Jerry Springer show is bollocks.”

Late nights and early mornings

Its fair to say sometimes I get a bit carried away with work. Its almost 9pm now and I have a serious decision to make – do I power up my virtual machines and finish preparing my presentation for tomorrow or do I go into the office really early to finish it – I have a presentation to give someone in finland at 9am and I really want to be at least nearly fnished by then.

Im partially tempted to just go watch TV – Grays Anatomy is starting, and whilst im not particularly a fan I sat quite comfortably here with a cup of coffee and don’t know if I can be bothered to find the remote. As I am sat here looking at the TV I am reminded that really I want to find a new mechanism for recording things that are on the TV – before I was using a Pioneer DVD recorder, but even at its highest setting it doesn’t render high definition images – couple that with the fact it uses SCART and you end up with a picture that just isn’t good on my high definition 3d tv.

Its funny, I think high definition TV is one of the only things that the porn industry seems to be against. The porn industry was instrumental in the creation of online credit card transactions, the webcam and the DVD. Apparently though high definition is a no no because it makes all these naked women look a little too real for some – a lot of the breast operation scarring and things like that never used to show up on fuzzy old VHS but is a lot more obvious in HD. Maybe that helps explain why there is no 3d porn around yet! I mean I cant believe they havent thought of 3d boobs yet.

Exploring Blog Posting In Word

I didn’t look at the blog posting functionality in word 2010 before about 5 minutes ago – I am configuring up my personal profile at work and there is a link on the page to blog with an external application. That launched this window and I successfully managed to publish to sharepoint 2010 with no effort at all. Once I did that I could not help but configure up content sources. This is awesome J

New branches on the tree of life

Johnathan Eison from the University of California has made an interesting discovery which may mean new branches being added to the tree of life. There are three branches at the moment – Eukarya (Plants and animals are here), Bacteria, and Archaea.

Basically scientists collected sea water from around the world and then sequenced all the DNA hoping to find something novel. Some of the dna sequences they found were not only unknown but also seemed to be completely different to the rest of the tree. Its worth noting at this point that Eisen was processing Genes not organisms.

Now for me at least the story continues to get interesting because this information isnt  published in the traditional way. Traditionally scientists do their research then send it to various places to have it published. It basically means that traditional magazines such as new scientists can greatly affect how seriously these discoveries are taken.

Eisen isnt ready for this formal scrutiny just yet, so what did he do… he blogged about it. He states in his blog:

My key fear here is that somehow in my communication with the press or in this post i will overstate our findings

… which i think is kind of cool. What he has done is skipped the whole standard publishing mechanism and is communicating to a group of scientists (and others) via his blog. Technology now enables him to do something that just wasnt possible a few years back and it will be interesting to see what will happen – will other scientists follow suit.

I cant help but wonder if this will have a long lasting impact on science in general – will it lead to less mainstream subjects getting consideration or will it bring out the lunatics. I guess time will tell.

Happy birthday to twitter…

Well happy 5th birthday to twitter. It wasnt in my calendar so i didnt get it a cake or anything, but at a push i could have some celebratory spare ribs at lunchtime (Subject to availability).

Im not a great twitter user – in my last version of my blog i was automatically syndicating to twitter, and I havent even bothered to update the syndication on this current site. I rarely log into twitter at all, even though i have an iphone app for it.

A year or so back i had my twitter account hacked – which is the only online service i have had that has ever been compromised so i find it hard to get warm and fuzzy over it. Tweeting is akin to updating your facebook status, and i dont do that either. If im not careful here i know im going to get a reputation as being a bit of a cyber grouch – i like the whole idea of social networking, but just have questioned some of its implimentations in the past. I have nothing bad to say about LinkedIn!!!

…I have to admit though, many people do like twitter – and the video on twitters homepage was quite compelling – i can understand its social relivancy – basically its for people that cant be assed to blog. by making quick updates on little things that you do you give people a different perception on you – i might write “listening to pachabels Cannon” and everyone would think “wow so he is a really sensible lovable fluffy bunny”… ok maybe not but you get the idea.

Twitter is here to stay. With millions of users it has affected language, having tweet and other words put in the dictionary, and im sure that shorthand text speak that bastardisation that i both hate and use has become more mainstream because of it… i caught myself typing “r u there” the other day, which isnt so bad, but the second i spell “with” as “wiv” i think i am going to go shoot myself.

Twitter has empowered people to communicate and organise – many of the riots out in egypt were coordinated using twitter. If i had known such a simple medium could get so much social attention i think i would have used it to my advantage when my iphone 4 turned up later – im thinking of a new twitter name now “RyanairNeedSpanking” – hmm.

Ok i think i will add a twitter webpart to my homepage here and use it for a week just to see if it catches on – now that i effectively have been having a rough time getting blogs out. Work is crazy busy so there is time for little else

Suggestion for all those guys at SL

It’s 6.30 am and I am on the tube – I think that before 7am the tube should have dim lights, soft enya type music and a woman that should come round with a breakfast trolley for all the loyal monthly card holders ….

Angry Birds Forever!

Ok I am now ranked 135032 of 8964965 players in angry birds – I have every golden egg, and 3 stars in every level but still haven’t hit the high score achievement in the game centre… Maybe that’s next, maybe instead I will get a life. Naa. Travel this morning is a bitch – there’s some race going on in central Stockholm so they cancelled my bus and all the extra time I made coming in early has been lost. I’m now heading to Ropesten to get a bus from there. It’s going to be a busy day at work and I’ve not been blogging so much recently because I am not allowed to talk about most of what I have been doing; theres a veil of secrecy that has to around my day to day operations for now! …even this has taken two days to post!!

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