Stupid names

Over the years I’ve heard of people, and known some people with really stupid names.

Superman works in a hotel in Sri Lanka, and is a really nice guy.

In Brazil there are triplets named Xerox, Authenticada and Photocopia; also there’s a girl named airline and my personal favorite was a kid who’s name translated into English as “the last passion of mr & mrs Desilva”.

In china they have tried naming kids . and @. Thankfully the authorities put a stop to that one.

In UK we have someone named playstation who was in the paper a few years back, and someone who’s named after all 13 players in Man United.

I once worked with a Richard Head – it’s not just a myth – take a look at this name in – some parents are right bastards. In there are also two named Mary Hinge.

There’s a Jonny Cash song about a guy named Sue. I can only assume that people who name their children in such fashion dont raise them in places like my hometown. I had enough trouble with my middle name Duncan which they shortened to dunky (slang for condom). We had one or two lively debates about that, during one of them a schoolmate became so animated he fell over and broke his nose. Poor fella.

If a guy named Richard Head went to my school his life expectancy would be shorter than that of the Vaasa ( a ship in Sweden that sank 12 minutes after it launched – apparently weight distribution is important. I wouldn’t want to be an engineer on that project)

The photo is of a random Richard Head I found in google.


If I was a yes man

If i was a yes man today I would have done the following:

  1. Screwed myself over by taking on too much responsibility tonight.
  2. I would have planned to have gone out for beers with someone I shouldn’t go for beers with, and then not turned up
  3. I would have purchased a new domain.
  4. I would have brought Steven Kings Mile 81.
  5. I would have not gone back to the office after lunch, and would currently be in hospital with alcohol poisoning (missing the “date”)
  6. I would have seen a lot of porn.

Instead I am sat comfortably and happily at home with some coffee, smiling to myself, because I am not a yes man – I am a why man.

Incidentally the movie Yes Man, is pretty cool, tho I once put the DVD on when I had family visiting, having completely forgot the bit where he had to accept a blow job from an old woman. That was an uncomfortable moment.

Skype Vunerablility

Its hard to believe that the vunerability in this video exists – because it seems to imply one of the fundamental rules for secure coding is being broken here – ie – always check your inputs. Its quite a cool video to see though and worth noting.

The real lord of the rings

It’s silly but often in life and in movies the real hero of any given story isn’t actually the character everyone focuses on. Take lord of the rings – it’s all about Frodo, and the burden of being the ring bearer – and on the film they make everyone empathize with Frodo because it’s so difficult having such a responsibility. Nobody gives a second thought for Sam Gamgee, who at one point carries the ring, saves Frodo then at the end of the movie carries not only the ring but also Frodo up the side of mount Doom,

Incidentally on the net there are several alternate endings for Lord of the rings – taking one of those eagles and just dropping the ring in the fires of mount doom would have been soo much easier. As Frodo’s limp body was scooped up but the eagle at the end of the film – he must have been thinking “doh”?

Bored of the rings, the adventure game on the BBC micro just popped into my head. It was fun!

eHarmony Video Bio

This is silly – enjoy.

Some funnies

Really silly but made me laugh:

Improving upon the grape in a microwave

Ok in the name of science we are looking at how we can improve on the grape in a microwave plasma generating experience.

Glen and myself have agreed we will pay 50% of the costs each and try a number of different things.

  1. Firstly if you can generate plasma with a grape- what other fruits have the high electrolyte content that could be used to generate plasma? How much power do we need to make this effective?
  2. Secondly what would happen if we run the grape in a glass for a full minute.

Now we are going to try to be safe here, and shoot this from a distance behind something solid, outside at night time (to minimise the poison gas / shrapnel side of things.

On the same evening we will probably also do the jam jar rocket and post the videos here; this may take a while to organise as i have a fairly busy schedule.

In the meanwhile i am open to suggestions for things to try here – just post a comment – its been suggested i try a box of wine, and a marshmallow. I won’t promise i will do them all but will probably give the ones that aren’t likely to kill a person a go.

X-Men: the Last Stand.

I’m going and ripping all my DVDs to Hard Disk so i can watch them on apple TV at the moment. Whilst doing that I’ve occasionally caught myself watching things i haven’t seen in years – Amongst them is X-men the last stand. I had forgotten how cool it is. The bit at the end where Logan is struggling towards Jean, and she’s disintegrating the island with her mind is awesome. As the bits of logan disintegrate and disappear the special effects are just incredible – coupled with a really awesome soundtrack, i couldn’t help but crank up the volume and really experience death and destruction in my living room. I kind of wish they had produced it in 3D. Famke Janssen played Jean Grey, really well and incidentally  seems to have enormous feet whenever you see her in a photo.

Theres somethings really attractive about a woman who could destroy the world with her mind, and i do love the story of Jean Grey – theres been much debate as to if it was her power that corrupted her, or some kind of external entity. Personally i prefer the idea that it was her own power that lead her down a path to darkness; alien possessing her is a bit of a lame story line and everyone likes a bad girl!!

Waiting For Windows 8!

""Oh no, not another one"

Windows 8 is scheduled for release autumn of 2012; its still a while away but i am looking forward to it. Theres one feature i kind of wish windows 7 had – Hyper-V. Non techies out there, its a virtualization technology – a way of making your computer effectively run another computer inside a window. As a software developer having the ability to do this is essential – on one laptop you can model several other computers, change their network configurations, or save a snapshot of them – so if you really screw things up you can go back to your save game.

There are many good virtualization technologies out there – microsoft had Hyper V running as a dedicated server product which made it next to useless for developers. Some developers will run windows server 2008 on their laptop sure, but most dev’s i know are far more happy using windows 7 because it also runs world of warcraft. VMWare has always been my virtualization technology of choice, but if they bring Hyper-V to a standard desktop OS, i may have to seriously reconsider my thinking.

Grape in a microwave

Don’t try this at home! Don’t blame me if you kill yourself.

Your other half will get really annoyed if you blow up her microwave. The experiment is this – take a seedless grape, cut almost in half and open it up leaving a tiny bit of skin connecting both halves.. Put it face up in the microwave, put a glass over the top (heat resistant is probably an idea), then turn the microwave on for  up to 30 seconds (the longer its on the more dangerous it is).. you should end up with your own miniature fireball in a glass. See the video below.

How does this happen? Grape juice is ion rich, crammed full of electrolytes which conduct electricity. Each half of your grape is full of electrolytes which are connected by the grape skin which isn’t a great conductor. When you switch on the microwave the microwave excites the electrolytes and makes them move rapidly between the two halves of the grape. The current thats produce heats up the little bit of connecting skin to 3000c and burst into flame. At the same time the electrons arc through the gap between the grape halves, across the flame, which turns the air surrounding the grape into blue plasma.

The gas the guy is smelling in the video is most likely ozone (O3) – which isn’t really good for you. Theres also a chance that the glass / microwave might explode, but to live in fear is not to live at all. You read the disclaimer at the top right?

Risks doing this include

  • Poison Gas
  • Fire
  • Exploding Glass
  • Burning
  • Breaking your microwave
  • Pissing off your other half.
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